It's been a while since I posted...I think. I've been kind of obsessing about art, without doing a lot...but here's something I finished for Art Squared Theme Week.
Still wondering why I can't just enjoy my continued remission. I read somewhere that that's not the correct term; that 'remission' is properly used only to refer to lymphoma...or something. Words, words, words. Anyway, I just can't seem to take any pleasure in it; nor can I seem to get my anxiety to abate. I think it's because I feel I deserve this cancer, and that my karmic status depends upon my suffering. That's a habit of mind that's so hard to break. And now that I'm not working, which involved doing things that were constantly of help to people, I can't help feeling the balance is shifting even more...God! happy, well, and just doing things for my own pleasure! This can't go on.
2 comments:
Wow! I love it! And here's my tip of the day for your guilty conscience-- the world does not revolve around you my dear, (as much as it seems to sometimes, and you know that MY world revolves around you), hence, there is no need to indulge in self-centered, narcissistic fantasies that you have altered your "karmic status". You have paid for this period of happiness many times over in your life, so just sit back and enjoy the ride.
Okay.
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