These are examples of my newest enthusiasm, miniature art. The one on top is a pen and ink/watercolor piece called "Spring Landscape", and is only 1.3x1.4 inches in size. The second one, pen and ink on Bristol paper, is titled "Exemplar" (what used to be called a sampler), and is 1.2x.6 inches in size.

I have no idea why I develop these small obsessions. I'm never happier, though, than when I've discovered something new to obsess over. I suppose it's a way to distract myself from the down and dirty, nitty gritty of my medical condition, etc. John told me today I was getting quite "artsy-fartsy"; I know he meant well, but sometimes I do wonder if it's all just pretense...perhaps it would be more honest if I just stuck my head under the pillow, refused to bathe, and wailed "woe is me" all day and night. But then again, I suppose you could do the same. We're all in the same boat, in this existence.

Back to do more art.

May

Okay, here's mine

It says I'm quiet and reserved. Hee hee.

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have low extroversion. You are quiet and reserved in most social situations. A low key, laid back lifestyle is important to you. You tend to bond slowly, over time, with one or two people. Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness. Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all. In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted. And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium. You are generally broad minded when it come to new things. But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it. You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

Okay, just one more

Your World View

You are a fairly broadminded romantic and reasonably content. You value kindness and try to live by your ideals. You have strong need for security, which may be either emotional or material. You respect truth and are flexible. You like people, and they can readily make friends with you. You are not very adventurous, but this does not bother you.

What Is Your World View?

This is kind of fun

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have low neuroticism. You are very emotionally stable and mentally together. Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly. Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

It's been a while since I posted...I think. I've been kind of obsessing about art, without doing a lot...but here's something I finished for Art Squared Theme Week.

Still wondering why I can't just enjoy my continued remission. I read somewhere that that's not the correct term; that 'remission' is properly used only to refer to lymphoma...or something. Words, words, words. Anyway, I just can't seem to take any pleasure in it; nor can I seem to get my anxiety to abate. I think it's because I feel I deserve this cancer, and that my karmic status depends upon my suffering. That's a habit of mind that's so hard to break. And now that I'm not working, which involved doing things that were constantly of help to people, I can't help feeling the balance is shifting even more...God! happy, well, and just doing things for my own pleasure! This can't go on.

have to have the last word

Yes, Mr. Zen is adorable!

Thank you, Carrie...

...for making that clear. No, I did not lock my children in closets, although sometimes I felt like that was the only way to keep them from behavior that would lead to their demise (demises? sorry, I'm obsessed with grammar).

For those of you who'd like to know what the hell Carrie is talking about, go here: http://www.narpa.org/. Sounds like a wonderful organization, does it not? Trouble is, they're just as dogmatic as the people on the other side of the question, who believe that all psychiatric illness is caused by "brain disorders". Nothing's ever that simple.

Oh, and thanks, Carrie, for the compliment about my limerick. Just its mention in the same paragraph as the piece de resistance of the genre is the ultimate encomium.

(Mr. Zen above. Isn't he cute?)

May